There are many sad things about the mainstreaming of Hong Kong filmmakers and style. Tsui Hark working with Dennis Rodman. Jackie Chan working with Jennifer Love Hewitt. Brett Ratner working... But the most disturbing aspect of this trend is that more money is being spent on re-dubbing and subtitling for distribution of these gems in the West. And that means one of the most endearing and amusing elements of HK films -- the universally bad and often inscrutable translations -- have largely become a thing of the past. Fortunately for all of us, intrepid authors Hammond and Wilkins have done humanity a great service by cataloging the best -- that is to say, "worst" -- miscues and malaprops from a whole slew of HK films in their stellar book Sex and Zen and a Bullet in the Head: The Essential Guide to Hong Kong's Mind-Bending Films. The list is reproduced here for posterity, along with a few amusing titles/dubs I've encountered. If you enjoy them, by all means buy the book. It's a lot of fun -- and the authors will be more likely to thank me for free advertising than to sue me for copyright infringement.

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